Attempted murder in Hootin' Holler?

Snuffy Smith, 2013-10-28.

Of course, it may be that Elviney wasn't trying to kill her husband. Maybe she just didn't realise that forcing an old man to sleep in a freezing cold barn might be bad for his health.

On the other hand, why was he so cold? The cow was presumably there with him, and he had a blanket. Uncomfortable, sure, but out of the elements and sharing an enclosed space with animals whose body heat should keep the place relatively warm. Did he decide to just sleep outside instead? Maybe his condition is his own fault.

Tiny Pumpkins

A gaggle of small pumpkins with  legs and wicked grins are running about. Heathcliff hears the rumble of their approach before he sees them, but soon enough he spots them and flees in terror. No sooner has he escaped these horrors than he is assaulted from above by a squadron of small grinning pumpkins with wings and is forced to run again!

"What happened to all my tiny pumpkins?" wonders the pumpkin farmer.

Heathcliff, 2013-10-27.

Solemn Luxury

Ed Crankshaft stands on his verandah, sadly mournfully surveying his yard. He gets out his mobile phone and wordlessly dials a number.
"Luxury air taxi service..." says the voice on the other end of the line.

Crankshaft, 2013-10-21.

Amazing Sound Effects

The Amazing Spider-Man, 2013-10-22.

Look, I don't like to question the obvious genius of Stan Lee, but I'm just not convinced that ripping a metal grate out of a brick wall would sound anything like "thrripp". That strikes me more as the sort of sound that Velcro makes when you pull it apart. But then again, I've never pulled a metal grate out of a wall, so maybe it does sound like that.

Moose and Molly

"Jack will be able to date our neighbor's daughter if her father approves of him" says Molly.
"Father is anxious to meet you!" says the Millers' neighbour to Molly's Brother Jack.
The Millers' neighbour's father waits in a darkened room, standing next to a lounge chair at which two lamps have been pointed, making it the only well-lit spot in the room.

I'm confused. Why does Molly's Brother Jack need the approval of his girlfriend's grandfather?

Moose and Molly, 2013-10-21.

Six Chix

Mrs. Dracula is sitting at a desk in the middle of an otherwise empty room. On the desk is a computer and a cat. The computer is off and the cat is sleeping. Behind her, Dracula regards himself with dissatisfaction. It seems he is worried about his weight.
"Maybe you haven;t been getting enough estrogen." says Mrs. Dracula.

I guess drinking the blood of women is slimming, and you put on weight if you drink too much men's blood. If you're a vampire. I'm not sure why that should be.

Six Chix, 2013-10-21.

Mary Worth

Mary Worth, 2013-10-16.

Could this be the most awkward hug ever depicted? It's certainly a contender. Shelly is pressing her face against Mary's cheek in a really weird way, Mary's sort of just holding Shelly's shoulders rather than actually putting her arms around her, and I'm not sure what's going on with Shelly's arms at all. Is she even hugging Mary back, or are her arms just hanging limply out to the sides?

Also, Mary looks like she's desperately searching fo an exit in panel one.

Ginger Meggs

"Wow! A rainbow!" says Ginger, apparently unfazed by the fact that the rainbow appears to be solid, stationary and present on a dry, cloudless day.
"I wonder where it leads!" he exclaims as he rushes heedlessly across the bizarre phenomenon.
Arriving at the other end he finds himself at home where his mother is waiting.
"Oh, hello, Ginger." she says, equally undaunted by the mysterious rainbow. "While you're here, I have some chores for you!"

Ginger Meggs, 2013-10-16.

Blondie

Blondie, 2013-10-13.

Wow, Dagwood is really committed to this game. And he obviously made preparations beforehand, just in the hope that it'd come in useful.

Well, either that or there's some other reason that he happened to have a blonde wig, high-heeled shoes and women's clothing that all fit him perfectly.

He's also done an impressive job of altering his body shape to fit the disguise. And he's actually cooking something as well. He's really gone all out.

F-Minus

A long-haired man is having a mug-shot taken by the police. The police officer taking the photograph has set up an electric fan beside the man to blow his hair to the side. The man does not seem to appreciate this.
"Are you sure you don't want it?" asks the officer. "It's pretty dramatic."

F-Minus, 2013-10-15.

Funky Winkerbean

Based on the Funky Winkerbean strip published on 2013-10-13.

Spider-Man

The Amazing Spider-Man, 2013-10-12.

I love Astella's facial expressions in both panels here, but my god, look at El Condor's face in panel two! That's art.

F-Minus

"Since tattoos are frowned upon in the workplace, I got it in a spot I could easily conceal." says one man to another.
Contrary to expectations the man actually has a tattoo on his face but has specifically grown his hair in such a way that some hair hangs down over his right cheek, obscuring the tattoo, but making him look ridiculous in the process.

F-Minus, 2013-10-12.

Luann

Luann, 2013-10-12.

For those who haven't been keeping up with Luann (and why would you have?) Quill is Luann's long-distance boyfriend from Australia, and he's coming to America again soon, so he'll be staying with the Berger family, and evidently sharing a room with Gunther.

So Gunther's set up the room into two clearly delineated halves. Gunther's side with various things he likes or is interested in, and Quill's side which is Australian. Because that is the extent of Quill's personality. He's Australian. Also he's heterosexual.

And if there's one thing we Australians love, it's the first things that come to an American's mind when they hear the word "Australia". Kangaroos, koalas, the Sydney Opera House, a map of Australia, the Australian flag. That's about it, right? The entire nation distilled down to its core.

And where would you even get a kangaroo lamp? Who would buy that?

Also worth noting, like Chip Flagston, Gunther loves lava-lamps. But what 21st century teenager doesn't have one of those in their room?

Ziggy

Ziggy is drawing faces on some pumpkins.
"I can't bring myself to cut them!" he says.

Ziggy, 2013-10-12.

Moose and Molly

Molly's Brother Jack and Moose are playing horseshoes in the yard. Chester watches them from inside his house. He's a little worried because Moose and Jack have set up the stake at the end of the yard nearest his house and are therefore throwing the horseshoes toward it, and that side of the house has a large window, which might be broken if either of the players throws a horseshoe a little too vigorously.

Moose and Molly, 2013-10-11.

Garfield

Based on the Garfield strip published on 2013-10-11.

F-Minus

"Since you bought the car as-is, this is your problem now." says one man to another as he opens the boot of the car in question to reveal a man, bound and gagged.

The man who has just bought the car seems slightly taken aback. The man in the boot looks furious.

F-Minus, 2013-10-11.

Beetle Bailey

Beetle Bailey, 2013-10-10.

Actually, what work is there to do around there? What is Camp Swampy? The people stationed there never seem to do anything beyond the occasional training drill, and they've been there for years. They never go anywhere, they never engage in any sort of warfare, they don't seem to interact with any other part of the armed forces, they just seem to kill time.

And who the hell is Sarge trying to kid anyway, everyone can see those papers he's playing with are blank.

Pluggers

Sheila and Andy are out at a restaurant.
"Oh, this looks good!" says Sheila, looking through the menu.
"Oooh, this doesn't look good." think Andy, doing the same.

A plugger knows, the darker the restaurant, the higher the prices.

You see, men earn the money and are fiscally responsible and their wives just want to spend all of it.

Pluggers, 2013-10-11.

Mandrake the Magician

Based on the Mandrake strip that ran on 2013-10-11.

Heathcliff

Heathcliff is tending his garden, in which he is growing a large amount of catnip. You can tell it's catnip because it's clearly labelled as such. At the front of the garden he has erected a scarecrow wearing a suit and tie with a bag slung over one arm, on which is written the word "vet".
"It keeps the cats away." remarks a small child.

All this leads one to wonder, what suicidal or foolhardy cat would dare to steal from Heathcliff anyway? And how long has Heathcliff been a drug dealer?

Heathcliff, 2013-10-11.

Snuffy Smith

Snuffy Smith, 2013-10-08.

The "husband/wife doesn't get along with spouse's parent(s)" joke is pretty common and certainly not worth bringing to your attention, but look at Loweezy in panel two. She's devastated.

Normally the feeling is reciprocated and the humour (such as it is) arises from this mutual antagonism, but Loweezy seems like she wants Snuffy's mother to like her and it really bothers her that she doesn't. And Elviney's taking it seriously too.

It's like it's turned into a soap opera strip. Or the artist got entirely the wrong impression and there was no communication between writer and illustrator.

Beetle Bailey

Based on the Beetle Bailey strip for 2013-10-08.

Moose and Molly

"My Brother Jack was awake all night thinking of the new job that he starts today!" says Molly.
Moose looks concerned.

Meanwhile, at Molly's Brother Jack's new job, he has fallen asleep at his desk. His employer, B.R. Buxton, displays an impressive degree of control as he squirts water from the bubble tap right across the room at him.

Moose and Molly, 2013-10-08.

Mary Worth

Oh my god, look at Jeff. He looks like he's just survived some sort of traumatic experience. That haunted look, the white-knuckled grip on the wheel, top button undone, the hair slightly out-of-place (a shorthand in Mary Worth that signifies a state of extreme dishevelment, such as exhibited by a survivor of flood or a drunk in a gutter).

Jeff clearly has something incredibly serious to tell Mary about, but she's just going to go right ahead and interrupt that with her announcement about how she's not doing the Ask Wendy column any more; a change that will affect Dr Jeff not at all.

Safe Havens

Safe Havens, 2013-10-07.

OK, I'll let the first panel slide because those black dots for eyes could be anything, but panel three is just ridiculous. We can clearly see that she has normal human eyes even as the other character present is commenting on her strange eyes.

Was it too difficult to draw her rolling her eyes and also have them look like cats' eyes? If so, the obvious solution would be to draw them as cats' eyes and have her convey her exasperation through body language. If that's even what she's supposed to be expressing. I can't really tell. So honestly you could just have given her cats' eyes and left the rest unchanged and it would have worked just as well.

The Lockhorns

The Lockhorns have decided to redecorate their home. Loretta has gone out, leaving Leroy to paint. Returning home, she discovers Leroy has completed the task.
"I see you painted the walls, a third of the carpet and half of yourself." she comments morosely.
Leroy regards her with a look of great sadness but says nothing. No response is required, it was merely a statement of fact, neither praise nor judgement, no blame or commiseration. The walls may now be a cheerful shade of pink, but no environment can lift the fog of depression and ennui in which they live their lives.

The Lockhorns, 2013-10-07.

Tina's Groove

Gus, Tina and Suzanne are at a bar. Gus has a beer, Tina has a glass of wine and Suzanne has a martini bigger than her head.
"I've got people living vicariously through me..." she explains. "I can't let them down."

Tina's Groove, 2013-10-04.

Heathcliff

Heathcliff leads a line of cats down the footpath, following a woman carrying a can of paint.
"That color is called 'sardine.'" explains the main in the paint shop to his assistant.

Heathcliff, 2013-10-04.

Beetle Bailey

Beetle Bailey, 2013-10-03.

I think the situation may actually be a little more urgent than Beetle imagines. I get that he's comfortable there, but I think that's likely to change when the mother eagle gets back.

Killer's attitude is a little odd as well. He doesn't seem worried or bothered, his expression just says "Yeah, Beetle's sleeping in an eagle's nest again. Same old Beetle." The only one reacting appropriately here is Sarge.

Hi and Lois

Hi and Lois, 2013-10-03.

For those who don't know, Beetle Bailey is actually Lois Flagston's brother. It seems kind of weird that Chip has a picture of Beetle on his bedside table though. Then again, he also has a KISS poster and a lava-lamp, so maybe he just decorates his room with random stuff he finds.

Also, what is he eating? Is that a bowl of scrambled eggs? He doesn't even have a fork.

Moose and Molly

"Every company in town refuses to hire me," says Molly's Brother Jack, "and my former girlfriend won't return the engagement ring"
"Jack," says Moose, "forget those problems! Go fishing!"

Molly's Brother Jack takes Moose's advice and heads out to the river with his dog. He even manages to catch a pretty impressive fish, Unfortunately a bear also spots the fish and grabs it. This proves to be a problem for Molly's Brother Jack as his fishing rod is still attached to the fish by the hook with which he caught it and there appears to be no way to get the bear to drop the fish or to unhook it.

Oh well, I'm sure he'll be fine.

Moose and Molly, 2013-10-03.

The Phantom

Based on the Phantom strip for 2013-10-03 and the Mark Trail strip from 2011-04-11.

Heathcliff

Two apes skip down the street carrying rubbish bins. Heathcliff and a raccoon watch them go by.
"The garbage ape's sidekick: Trash Chimp" explains the raccoon.

Heathcliff, 2013-10-01.

Beetle Bailey

"Here's your tray." says Sheila, bringing Gen. Halftrack his morning tea of a coffee, a bagel and a beer. "Where do you want it?"
"I don't care." says the general without looking up from the blank paper in front of him. "Any empty spot you can find"
So Sheila puts it on his head.

Beetle Bailey, 2013-10-02.

Slylock Fox

Slylock Fox & Comics for Kids, 2013-10-01.

Whoa, what the hell is going on here? This poor guy is just sitting down to dinner when suddenly a grinning maniac in a police uniform breaks down his door with a sledgehammer? Forget a the six differences, I want to know how this plays out. I can't see it ending well.

Fred Basset

Fred Basset, 2013-10-01.

An important part of the criminal justice system is the presumption of innocence and the requirement that the defendant be proven guilty beyond reasonable doubt to ensure that people do not suffer the consequences of crimes for which they are innocent. As William Blackstone said, "It is better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer".

As such, a valid defence can be made by showing that the crime may just as easily have been committed by another. If one cannot show which of the two is actually guilty then neither should be punished. So although Fred may have eaten the sausages, it cannot be proved that he did so and so he escapes punishment.

Of course, all this is irrelevant in this case as Fred is a dog and is therefore not legally responsible for his actions, and all blame rests with the owners who left the sausages where a dog could easily get them, and also left the doors and windows open, meaning that any animal could simply wander into the house.

And the worst thing is, this isn't even a rare occurrence. Fred is always eating food that his owners have left unattended, and various neighbourhood animals wander in and out of their house at all hours. Fred's owners are idiots.

Heathcliff

Heathcliff leaps three meters into the air and pounces on an unsuspecting man. At the apex of his jump, the man notices his impending doom but cannot react in time to avoid it.
"It's your 'Who Let the Dogs Out' ring tone." explains the woman sitting beside him, in a calm, matter-of-fact tone.

Heathcliff, 2013-09-30.