2012-06-27

Mary Worth

Dawn and Wilbur are sitting on an aeroplane.
"Turn that frown upside down!" says Wilbur. "Were going to have a great time!"
"Yippee." says Dawn, morosely.

Meanwhile...
Mary is sitting in front of a massive computer monitor.
"Dear Wendy, I need your help!" the screen says. "I can't go on like this any more!..."
"Oh dear!" thinks Mary.

Comic

Improving Apartment 3-G

Based on this recent A3G strip.

2012-06-25

Liō

Liō's father has two coupons for free ice-cream. Excitedly he runs to tell Liō, only to find that Liō has just detonated a nuclear bomb nearby.

Comic

Improving Apartment 3-G

Based on this recent A3G strip.

2012-06-23

Pardon My Planet

A teacher in a classroom addresses the parents of a student. "You can teach your kids anything you want in the privacy of your own home, but in my science class there will be no talk of invisible, unseen forces that control our day-to-day lives. Gravity and electromagnetism - rubbish!"

Comic

Improving Arctic Circle

Based on this recent Arctic Circle strip and a line from Futurama.

Liō

Liō is spraying ghosts with a bottle of febreze. A bottle of "new car scent" stands behind him, waiting to be used. A nearby sign advertises "Liō's Sppok - N - Span Ghost Cleaning" for the price of $1.00.

Comic

2012-06-22

Gaturro

Three cats are sitting on a roof. One of them has a really long neck, so long that his head is out of frame.

"¿Viste, Ágatha?" says one cat. "Gatulongo puede estirar y estirar su cuello..."
"¿Sí?" replies the second cat. "¿Cuánto?"

The next panel shows the head of the long-necked cat poking up through the clouds, on which a bearded man with tiny little wings and a halo is sleeping, wearing a sash reading "San Pedro". Behind him, a pipe sticks out of the cloud with a valve handle attached to it.

The long-necked cat retracts its neck, bringing its head down to where the other two cats are.
"Hoy no llueve" it says.

Comic

2012-06-20

Sally Forth

"Okay, Hil, you can do this..." thinks Hilary. "You can survive finals week. You can get through all your exams..."
"And then you can enjoy summer." thinks Nona.

"Wow, even I heard that!" says Faye.
"We're an unusual bunch, aren't we?" remarks Hilary.

Comic

2012-06-19

Tiger

A boy and his dog walk out of their house to find another boy standing on the footpath wearing a cowboy hat and with a bandana around his neck.

"Did you want to play cowboy?" asks the first boy.
"Might as well, I'm dressed for it" replies the second, without enthusiasm.

Comic

2012-06-18

Fred Basset

Fred's owner is talking to another man.
"I've always said," says Freud's owner, "Fred is one dog high and three dogs long!!"
"Ha ha ha" says the other man.

"Yes - There's nothing like an old joke..." thinks Fred.
"As long as it's a good old joke!!" he continues, glaring at his now worried owner.

The other man watches eagerly as Fred menaces his owner.

Comic

2012-06-17

Moose and Molly

Moose sits alone at a table in a restaurant.

"What menu?" asks the waiter. "If you don't smell it, we ain't got it".

Comic

2012-06-16

Bliss

A man and a woman stand in a featureless white void.

"I think I would know if I were a narcissist!" yells the man, shaking his hands in the air.
The woman glares at something offscreen.

Comic

Bleeker: the Rechargeable Dog

Skip, Lila and Grammy K are standing on the footpath. Skip and Lila are holding skateboards.
"Grammy K," says Skip, "this is my friend Lila"
"When I was a child," replies Grammy K, "girls wore dresses!"
"...But then you couldn't do this!" says Lila, doing a handstand on her skateboard.
"Why can't you be more like that!?" Grammy K demands of Skip.
"Nice meeting ya!" calls Lila as she skateboards away.

Comic

2012-06-14

Improving The Pajama Diaries

Based on this recent Pajama Diaries strip.

Shoe

Roz is at a restaurant with a friend.
"What a nice lunch..." her friend remarks. "Are you having a strawberry tart?"
"I'd better not." Roz replies, glaring with undisguised hatred and resentment. "They say tarts are the gateway dessert to cheesecake."
Her friend stares at her in goggle-eyed horror.

Comic

2012-06-13

Zits

"I'll have a #1 combo with fries and a shake." says Jeremy to a woman with a notepad.
"Same for me but with cold slaw." says Sara.

The woman vanishes and their menus are replaced with glasses of water with straws.
"Cole slaw" says Jeremy.
"Ezackly." says Sara. "Cold slaw is my Achilles' Tooth."

Suddenly the glasses are gone and Sara is eating a bowl of indistinct green stuff.
"I love this girl!" thinks Jeremy.
"Did I say something funny?" asks Sara, between bites.

Comic

2012-06-12

Improving Funky Winkerbean

Based on this recent Funky Winkerbean strip.

Hi and Lois

Hi stands in pitch black void holding a phone.
"We're taking a survey." a voice on the phone informs him.

"Do you text while driving?" the voice asks, as a circle of yellow light appears behind Hi's head, like the opening of some monstrous eye.
"No." he replies. "I also don't talk while I eat!"

Suddenly he is sitting at the dinner table in his house. His children stare at him in quiet horror while Lois just stares despondently into space.

Comic

2012-06-10

Pardon My Planet

A man is lying on a couch talking to a psychiatrist.
"Honestly, my life just seems so much better now since I've convinced myself that it's OK to not know why or who I'm going to vote for." he says.

Comic

Improving Apartment 3-G

Based on this recent Apartment 3-G strip.

Bliss

A man is carving trees into statues of bears with a chainsaw. A nearby sign says "Hand-made bear statues".

Comic

2012-06-08

Moose & Molly

Moose goes over to Chester's house. Chester's wife greets him at the front door.
"Chester invited mo over to watch baseball!" says Moose, walking inside.
"Your wife invited me over!" he tells Chester, sitting on the couch and giving a big wink to the audience.

Comic

Improving Tina's Groove

Based on this recent Tina's Groove strip.

2012-06-07

Family Circus

"Somebody needs to start me up!" wails Jeffy as he sits alone in the middle of an empty park on a swing suspended too high for him to safely dismount. Silence is his only answer.

Comic

2012-06-06

Pros and Cons

"I find myself irritated by the most trivial of things, Doc." says a patient to his psychiatrist.
"I see..." says the psychiatrist, thoughtfully. "By the way, it's doctor."

Comic

Improving Tina's Groove

Based on this recent Tina's Groove strip.

2012-06-05

Pluggers

A bear wearing clothes tells a dog wearing a collar to sit and stay.

"Pluggers know the value of a good education."

Comic

Apologies

I've been sick, so I haven't posted anything the last few days. The comic improvements I had already queued up to post went ahead, so there's been that, but the absence of comics for the blind is not me slowing down my posting schedule or anything, I just haven't had the will to do anything other than sit at my computer watching YouTube for the last few days.

But I'm feeling better now, so it should be back to normal. :-)

2012-06-01

Dennis the Menace

Dennis, his father and the dog are all sitting in the corner of the room, facing the wall and looking angrily over their shoulders at something behind them.

"I guess mom rules!" says Dennis.

Comic