Safe Havens

"I assumed Ming would wear an outlandish outfit to the Academy Awards." says the talking cat who I think used to be a dog?
"In a way," says Samantha, "she is! Her baby is part of it!"
"Wait." says the cat in alarm. "She's bringing Clay into the Oscars?"
"She's striking a blow for maternal acceptance." says Samantha.
"But..." says the cat, "don't they have a height requirement?"

"Hey, they let in Tom Cruise..." thinks Clay, who is currently in a completely different location with no way of knowing what the cat is saying and is therefore clearly not responding to it. I guess he's just surprised that Tom Cruise was let into the Oscars for some reason. I don't know, it seems pretty reasonable to me, he is a movie star.



Mark Trail

"Hi, Bluegill," says Rod, "how's my old friend?"
"Hi, Rod," says Rod, "I'd just like to know how you catch so many big bass!"
"Listen, you little squirt," says Rod, "are you accusing me of cheating?"
"No..." says Bluegill, "I'm just envious!"
"I'm a good fisherman — the best!" says Rod.
Mark, Rusty and Catfish observe this exchange in silence.



Beetle Bailey

"Where's beetle?!" demands Sgt. Snorkel.
"He's still in bed" says Pvt. Diller.
"What's his excuse this time?" asks Sgt. Snorkel of no one.

Pvt. Bailey is asleep in bed. Sgt. Snorkel arrives from outside.
"Get up!!" yells Sgt. Snorkel.
Pvt. Bailey's bed leaps into the air, spins around and contorts.
"Get down here!" demands Sgt. Snorkel.
The bed complies, hitting the floor with a THUMP.
"I meant for you to get up!" says Sgt. Snorkel to Pvt. Bailey.
"My bed wouldn't let me" says Pvt. Bailey.




Ziggy's front room contains a ship's wheel, an anvil, a large concrete lawn gnome, a cinder block and absolutely no furniture or other decorations.
"...In retrospect," he says "maybe joining the 'random heavy object of the month' club wasn't such a great idea!"



On The Fastrack

Bud grumpily approaches a computer from which sprout a number of large, green cables. He yanks them out and throws them away.
"I found some computer worms trying to disguise themselves as a tangle of cables." he says. It's not clear what he thinks a "computer worm" is, but if there are actually giant green worms that attach themselves to computers, that's pretty horrifying.



Mother Goose and Grimm

Mother Goose is reading a book in bed. She does not appear to be enjoying it. In fact, she seems worried or disturbed by what she reads. Suddenly the lights go out.
"Oh no..." think Mother Goose, "the electricity went off again and I don't have any candles to read by"
Fortunately she has an odd rectangular light-source with "Kindle" written on it which she is able to hold up to read by. It's not clear what this light source is, since it's clearly not a Kindle. Some sort of promotional item perhaps? It's very awkwardly shaped for a torch. Perhaps it's meant to be bright enough to light a room when sat on a desk or table? It doesn't seem at all practical.




"Your health insurance company says you have to jump through this hoop first!" says a nurse, holding out an actual plastic hoop in front of Ziggy.
Ziggy contemplates the hoop with anxiety. He doesn't know if this is a joke at his expense or if his insurance company really requires this, but one way or another he is definitely going to have to jump through that hoop, because his life is an unending series of trials and indignities.



The Lockhorns

Loretta answers the door to find Leroy standing there, arm-in-arm with a gigantic young lady. Both are smiling broadly.
"You're always complaining I'm not spontaneous enough!" says Leroy.
Loretta just watches him sadly.




"I'd like to have a big, gooey piece of chocolate candy" says Grossie.
Suddenly an angry, lumpy, misshapen fairy appears with a "poof!"
"The chocolate fairy says 'poo on goo'" says the fairy.
"What if I split it with you?" asks Grossie.
"The chocolate fairy says ...'no poo on goo'" says the fairy happily.
Grossie turns to smile at the audience with a sort of half shrug, as if to say "Fairies, right? What can you do?"




Ziggy has a picture of himself smiling on his wall. It has "Objects in mirror may be even more boring than they appear!" written on it. He stands looking at it unhappily.



Arlo and Janis

Arlo is sitting on the couch watching TV. He picks up the remote control and does something with it, then continues to watch. Janis, who has been sitting beside him, stands up.
"I think I'll go read!" she says.
"The video store is dead! Long live the video store!" thinks Arlo, doing something with the remote again.



The "Amazing" Spider-Man

"How can I get anywhere without my car keys?" asks a man.
"Good question!" says Peter, grinning and getting out of the car. "You'll have plenty of time to Google the answer!"

"Man, that felt good!" he says happily as he walks off.



Pondering Henry

What⁉ Henry can talk? But the whole premise of the comic...

OK, so Henry can talk, but we never see his dialogue. He's even clearly supposed to be talking "on-screen" in this comic, the person on the other end of the line can hear him. Not very well, but he's obviously talking.

So Henry's been talking the whole time? When people talk to him he responds with words? He's not mute?

So why don't we see his dialogue? Why is he portrayed as being silent if he actually can (and does) speak? Or, if he's portrayed as silent, why isn't he actually silent? I just don't get it.


Arlo and Janis

Arlo is asleep. Janis is glaring at him. Without saying anything, Janis slowly moves out of view. Arlo wakes up.
"A husband doesn't have to know everything." he says, going back to sleep.