2014-03-13

Sitcom Thursday: Food and Wine

"Bill's chippy isn't doing very well these days" says Chalky.
"Yeah, well it's his own fault" says Andy. "He should fix his sign"
It seems that some of the letters have come off and the sign now reads "ILL HIPPY", although the missing letters can still be seen fairly clearly and the shop has big windows so you can see in from the street, so it's unlikely that people are actually being confused or put off by the sign.



"I'm drinking a glass of red... Alone." muses Lizzie. "Is that OK or is it a cry for help? If it's a cry for help, nobody would hear it."

"...'cause I'm drinking alone, baby!"



Ed approaches the counter at a fast-food restaurant.
"You're serving a burger on brioche?" he asks. "Brioche?"
"Yes, sir." says the unfortunate staff member forced to deal with him.
"When I was in Paris last summer I never saw brioche used with a burger." says Ed, closing his eyes sadly. "Don't you think it's a little pretentious?"
"Gee, I don't know, sir..." says the staff member, "but then I'm not the one acting like a jetsetter in line at Wendy's."
Ed is momentarily taken aback but recovers quickly.
"Maybe you misunderstood..." he begins, condescendingly. "You see, brioche is a classic French bread with a paper-thin crust and silky, tender crumb... in France, it's used with fine meats. Putting a cheeseburger on it seems inauthentic to me."
"Got it, sir." says the staff member, who absolutely could not give less of a fuck. "You know, I'd ask if you want French fries, but we might be here all week..."

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