Bizarro, 2014-08-22.
A man in a hooded windcheater is walking down the street carrying two bags marked with dollar signs when he is accosted by a large woman wearing a costume modelled on the classic Superman look.
"You're Superwoman?" he asks.
"Fashion models don't fight crime, Mary." she replies.
Kryptonians have super powers though. They don't need to look big and tough because they have super powers. And why does she assume that he's referring to her appearance? Her face is clearly visible, he may just recognise her. And why does she call him Mary? That seems like a fairly sexist way for Superwoman to insult someone. I don't like this comic.
Family Circus, 2014-08-22.
Thel, Billy, Dolly and Jeffy are sitting at the table waiting to eat. PJ begins to climb onto Bil's chair, but Dolly leaps to her feet and points accusingly at him.
"That's not your seat, PJ! Your head's not big enough to sit there."
This would have seemed weird enough by itself, because no one has ever thought that any of the Keane children's heads weren't big enough, but this is the second time in a month that PJ has been told that his head is too small.
Ziggy, 2014-08-27.
Ziggy looks into his bathroom mirror only to see a giant, grinning rabbit standing directly behind him, a rabbit that is only visible in the mirror.
"...uh..." he says, shaking with fear. "...er..."
Showing posts with label Bizarro. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bizarro. Show all posts
2014-06-18
One-Panel Wednesday: Cats and Hedehogs
Heathcliff, 2014-06-12.
Heathcliff, pursued by two police officers, waves to Sonja as he passes her house.
"He always makes time to see you." says Sonja's owner.
Kliban's Cats, 2014-06-12.
A woman sits for a painter, holding a cat on her lap. As the painter paints her, the cat sitting on his lap works on the part of the painting featuring the woman's cat.
Bizarro, 2014-06-16.
A woman looks out the front windows of her house. In a row alongside the path to the doorway a line of hedgehogs have been partially buried, forming a decorative border. Two of them have managed to escape and are walking away.
"Chet," says the woman in alarm, "I don't think you buried the hedgehogs deep enough."
Dennis the Menace, 2014-0616.
Alice and Dennis are in a shop. The woman behind the counter is glaring at Alice. Alice is glaring at Dennis.
"But how can I watch my language?" asks Dennis. "It's invisible!"
What did he say? And why is the woman behind the counter so angry about it? The far more interesting part of this story apparently happened off-screen, just before the bit we actually get to see.
Heathcliff, pursued by two police officers, waves to Sonja as he passes her house.
"He always makes time to see you." says Sonja's owner.
Kliban's Cats, 2014-06-12.
A woman sits for a painter, holding a cat on her lap. As the painter paints her, the cat sitting on his lap works on the part of the painting featuring the woman's cat.
Bizarro, 2014-06-16.
A woman looks out the front windows of her house. In a row alongside the path to the doorway a line of hedgehogs have been partially buried, forming a decorative border. Two of them have managed to escape and are walking away.
"Chet," says the woman in alarm, "I don't think you buried the hedgehogs deep enough."
Dennis the Menace, 2014-0616.
Alice and Dennis are in a shop. The woman behind the counter is glaring at Alice. Alice is glaring at Dennis.
"But how can I watch my language?" asks Dennis. "It's invisible!"
What did he say? And why is the woman behind the counter so angry about it? The far more interesting part of this story apparently happened off-screen, just before the bit we actually get to see.
2014-05-14
One-Panel Wednesday: Dumb Jokes and Dumb Kids
Bizarro, 2014-05-12.
A man dressed as Robin Hood is at a doctor's looking at an eye-chart, but instead of letters or symbols it has apples on it.
"Granny Smith, Braeburn..." he says, "um... Red Delicious?"
William Tell's mandatory pre-employment physical
Look, I can sort of see where you're coming from with this, Piraro, but it doesn't work. The pieces don't really fit together properly. William Tell would need good eyesight to shoot an apple off his son's head, but that wasn't his job, and he didn't need to identify the type of apple. And why is he dressed as Robin Hood? You know that was a different guy, right?
Dennis the Menace, 2014-05-12.
"If our spaceship had room for a kitchen, you'd be my first cook in command." says Dennis nonsensically to the horrifying alien masquerading as his mother.
The Family Circus, 2014-05-13.
"Look at this little green apple that was growin' on our tomato plant." says Jeffy, holding an unripe tomato that he's just pulled off the plant.
Oh my god, how are you this dumb, Jeffy? How?
A man dressed as Robin Hood is at a doctor's looking at an eye-chart, but instead of letters or symbols it has apples on it.
"Granny Smith, Braeburn..." he says, "um... Red Delicious?"
William Tell's mandatory pre-employment physical
Look, I can sort of see where you're coming from with this, Piraro, but it doesn't work. The pieces don't really fit together properly. William Tell would need good eyesight to shoot an apple off his son's head, but that wasn't his job, and he didn't need to identify the type of apple. And why is he dressed as Robin Hood? You know that was a different guy, right?
Dennis the Menace, 2014-05-12.
"If our spaceship had room for a kitchen, you'd be my first cook in command." says Dennis nonsensically to the horrifying alien masquerading as his mother.
The Family Circus, 2014-05-13.
"Look at this little green apple that was growin' on our tomato plant." says Jeffy, holding an unripe tomato that he's just pulled off the plant.
Oh my god, how are you this dumb, Jeffy? How?
2012-11-11
2012-09-06
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