Showing posts with label Dennis the Menace. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dennis the Menace. Show all posts
2018-09-10
2014-08-20
One-Panel Wednesday: All hail Heathcliff, for he is our new god-king.
Dennis the Menace, 2014-08-08.
"I was supposed to sit here for 15 minutes, but I think I've gone into overtime." says Dennis glumly.
A very large, creepy-looking cat smirks at him.
Family Circus, 2014-08-08.
"I want you to know that you can be arrested for wearing socks with sandals." says Dolly, pointing at Jeffy's feet.
Jeffy looks suitably chagrined.
Heathcliff, 2014-08-12.
Heathcliff and two other cats are on a stage wearing egg cotumes and playing musical instruments. A crowd of other cats watch them in silence. The drum kit bears the name "Dumpty". Three humans observe from a nearby window.
"His new band." says one.
Heathcliff, 2014-08-19.
Heathcliff is seated on a throne between two flaming torches. Behind him looms a massive cat's head idol. One mouse beats a drum as another approaches with a cocktail on a tray.
"Just another Tuesday night." remarks one owl to another.
Heathcliff, 2014-08-20.
Heathcliff flies over the neighbourhood in a helicopter made in his image.
"It's garbage night somewhere." remarks one man to another.
"I was supposed to sit here for 15 minutes, but I think I've gone into overtime." says Dennis glumly.
A very large, creepy-looking cat smirks at him.
Family Circus, 2014-08-08.
"I want you to know that you can be arrested for wearing socks with sandals." says Dolly, pointing at Jeffy's feet.
Jeffy looks suitably chagrined.
Heathcliff, 2014-08-12.
Heathcliff and two other cats are on a stage wearing egg cotumes and playing musical instruments. A crowd of other cats watch them in silence. The drum kit bears the name "Dumpty". Three humans observe from a nearby window.
"His new band." says one.
Heathcliff, 2014-08-19.
Heathcliff is seated on a throne between two flaming torches. Behind him looms a massive cat's head idol. One mouse beats a drum as another approaches with a cocktail on a tray.
"Just another Tuesday night." remarks one owl to another.
Heathcliff, 2014-08-20.
Heathcliff flies over the neighbourhood in a helicopter made in his image.
"It's garbage night somewhere." remarks one man to another.
2014-07-10
One-Panel Wednesday: Misunderstood
Dennis the Menace, 2014-07-03.
Dennis and Gina are sitting together on a log.
"I always try to do what's right," says Dennis, "but I usually end up getting mixed results."
Gina looks incredibly bored.
Dennis the Flawed-But-Well-Intentioned just doesn't have the same ring to it, you know?
Dennis the Menace, 2014-07-07.
Margaret is selling lemonade for 50¢. Dennis and Joey are attempted to buy some. Also they're wearing cowboy outfits, Dennis's noticeably better and presumably more expensive than Joey's.
"I'm a 'barista' not a bartender!" says Margaret.
Margaret, you're not either of those things. Kids are idiots.
Ballard Street, 2014-07-08.
Three men stand on a grassed area using saws and saw-horses to cut some planks. One of them is doing it wrong.
Chuck's sawing club meets every Tuesday.
Oh those wacky Ballard Street people with their strange hobbies!
Dennis and Gina are sitting together on a log.
"I always try to do what's right," says Dennis, "but I usually end up getting mixed results."
Gina looks incredibly bored.
Dennis the Flawed-But-Well-Intentioned just doesn't have the same ring to it, you know?
Dennis the Menace, 2014-07-07.
Margaret is selling lemonade for 50¢. Dennis and Joey are attempted to buy some. Also they're wearing cowboy outfits, Dennis's noticeably better and presumably more expensive than Joey's.
"I'm a 'barista' not a bartender!" says Margaret.
Margaret, you're not either of those things. Kids are idiots.
Ballard Street, 2014-07-08.
Three men stand on a grassed area using saws and saw-horses to cut some planks. One of them is doing it wrong.
Chuck's sawing club meets every Tuesday.
Oh those wacky Ballard Street people with their strange hobbies!
2014-06-18
One-Panel Wednesday: Cats and Hedehogs
Heathcliff, 2014-06-12.
Heathcliff, pursued by two police officers, waves to Sonja as he passes her house.
"He always makes time to see you." says Sonja's owner.
Kliban's Cats, 2014-06-12.
A woman sits for a painter, holding a cat on her lap. As the painter paints her, the cat sitting on his lap works on the part of the painting featuring the woman's cat.
Bizarro, 2014-06-16.
A woman looks out the front windows of her house. In a row alongside the path to the doorway a line of hedgehogs have been partially buried, forming a decorative border. Two of them have managed to escape and are walking away.
"Chet," says the woman in alarm, "I don't think you buried the hedgehogs deep enough."
Dennis the Menace, 2014-0616.
Alice and Dennis are in a shop. The woman behind the counter is glaring at Alice. Alice is glaring at Dennis.
"But how can I watch my language?" asks Dennis. "It's invisible!"
What did he say? And why is the woman behind the counter so angry about it? The far more interesting part of this story apparently happened off-screen, just before the bit we actually get to see.
Heathcliff, pursued by two police officers, waves to Sonja as he passes her house.
"He always makes time to see you." says Sonja's owner.
Kliban's Cats, 2014-06-12.
A woman sits for a painter, holding a cat on her lap. As the painter paints her, the cat sitting on his lap works on the part of the painting featuring the woman's cat.
Bizarro, 2014-06-16.
A woman looks out the front windows of her house. In a row alongside the path to the doorway a line of hedgehogs have been partially buried, forming a decorative border. Two of them have managed to escape and are walking away.
"Chet," says the woman in alarm, "I don't think you buried the hedgehogs deep enough."
Dennis the Menace, 2014-0616.
Alice and Dennis are in a shop. The woman behind the counter is glaring at Alice. Alice is glaring at Dennis.
"But how can I watch my language?" asks Dennis. "It's invisible!"
What did he say? And why is the woman behind the counter so angry about it? The far more interesting part of this story apparently happened off-screen, just before the bit we actually get to see.
2014-06-12
One-Panel Wednesday: Mostly Menacing
Dennis the Menace, 2014-06-05.
Joey and Dennis observe a spider on a web.
"Now that's a web site." says Dennis.
No it isn't, Dennis. It's a web. I feel like this joke was written by someone who never stopped to think about the word "website" and where it came from. Because "web" and "net" are pretty apt descriptions of the way computers and sites are linked together, but Ketcham, Hamilton and Ferdinand just thought "Bah, those computer page things are call 'web sites', but what have they got to do with webs? Nothing!" and then they put their old man griping into the mouth of a five-year-old, because that's not incongruous at all.
Dennis the Menace, 2014-06-11.
"Grampa." says Dennis, sitting in his customary place in the corner of the room, facing the wall. "Your daughter was impossible today. You should make her sit in the corner."
Oliver appears to be giving the suggestion serious thought. Alice looks petulant.
Why do we never see what Dennis did to end up in the corner?
Joey and Dennis observe a spider on a web.
"Now that's a web site." says Dennis.
No it isn't, Dennis. It's a web. I feel like this joke was written by someone who never stopped to think about the word "website" and where it came from. Because "web" and "net" are pretty apt descriptions of the way computers and sites are linked together, but Ketcham, Hamilton and Ferdinand just thought "Bah, those computer page things are call 'web sites', but what have they got to do with webs? Nothing!" and then they put their old man griping into the mouth of a five-year-old, because that's not incongruous at all.
Dennis the Menace, 2014-06-11.
"Grampa." says Dennis, sitting in his customary place in the corner of the room, facing the wall. "Your daughter was impossible today. You should make her sit in the corner."
Oliver appears to be giving the suggestion serious thought. Alice looks petulant.
Why do we never see what Dennis did to end up in the corner?
2014-05-25
The Return of Weekend Workshop
I haven't done this in a couple of weeks, so here's a catch-up post.
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| Based on Beetle Bailey, 2014-05-05. |
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| Based on Moose and Molly, 2014-05-08. |
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| Based on Rex Morgan MD, 2014-05-14. |
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| Based on Pooch Café, 2014-05-16. |
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| Based on Dennis the Menace, 2014-05-14. |
2014-05-14
One-Panel Wednesday: Dumb Jokes and Dumb Kids
Bizarro, 2014-05-12.
A man dressed as Robin Hood is at a doctor's looking at an eye-chart, but instead of letters or symbols it has apples on it.
"Granny Smith, Braeburn..." he says, "um... Red Delicious?"
William Tell's mandatory pre-employment physical
Look, I can sort of see where you're coming from with this, Piraro, but it doesn't work. The pieces don't really fit together properly. William Tell would need good eyesight to shoot an apple off his son's head, but that wasn't his job, and he didn't need to identify the type of apple. And why is he dressed as Robin Hood? You know that was a different guy, right?
Dennis the Menace, 2014-05-12.
"If our spaceship had room for a kitchen, you'd be my first cook in command." says Dennis nonsensically to the horrifying alien masquerading as his mother.
The Family Circus, 2014-05-13.
"Look at this little green apple that was growin' on our tomato plant." says Jeffy, holding an unripe tomato that he's just pulled off the plant.
Oh my god, how are you this dumb, Jeffy? How?
A man dressed as Robin Hood is at a doctor's looking at an eye-chart, but instead of letters or symbols it has apples on it.
"Granny Smith, Braeburn..." he says, "um... Red Delicious?"
William Tell's mandatory pre-employment physical
Look, I can sort of see where you're coming from with this, Piraro, but it doesn't work. The pieces don't really fit together properly. William Tell would need good eyesight to shoot an apple off his son's head, but that wasn't his job, and he didn't need to identify the type of apple. And why is he dressed as Robin Hood? You know that was a different guy, right?
Dennis the Menace, 2014-05-12.
"If our spaceship had room for a kitchen, you'd be my first cook in command." says Dennis nonsensically to the horrifying alien masquerading as his mother.
The Family Circus, 2014-05-13.
"Look at this little green apple that was growin' on our tomato plant." says Jeffy, holding an unripe tomato that he's just pulled off the plant.
Oh my god, how are you this dumb, Jeffy? How?
2014-04-23
One-Panel Wednesday: Menace-Off
I've noticed recently that not only is Dennis the Menace decidedly un-menacing, but the kids from The Family Circus may actually have the edge on him, and when you're being out-menaced by the Keanes, you've really lost all claim to the title. So I thought I'd do a quick comparison of the last week's panels.
Thursday, 2014-04-17.
Dennis the Menace.
"Eatin' your cookies and changin' channels is the only exercise Mr. Wilson gets." says Dennis to Mrs. Wilson. Mr Wilson steadfastly ignores him and continues channel-surfing.
Family Circus.
The tablecloth has a large chunk cut out of it and a pair of scissors lie on the floor nearby.
"Maybe this'll just be one of those things we'll look back on and laugh." squawks Billy as Thel drags him out of the room.
OK, Billy has this one in the bag, hands down. Deliberately damaging the tablecloth for no apparent reason is far more menacing than just making a mildly inappropriate comment about Mr. Wilson's health.
Friday, 2014-04-18.
Dennis the Menace.
"What am I doin' wrong, dad?" asks Dennis, trying unsuccessfully to kick a football. "My punts look more like bunts."
Henry observes contemplatively.
Family Circus.
"I sure am glad PJ is still the size of my hug." says Dolly.
Let's call this one a draw. There's no menace in either one.
Saturday, 2014-04-19.
Dennis the Menace.
Alice points accusingly at an empty bowl.
"I didn't throw the carrots away, mom." says Dennis. "I put them outside for the Easter Bunny."
Family Circus.
Water covers the bathroom floor. A dispirited Bil stands over the toilet with plunger in hand.
"If it's easier, you could just buy me ANOTHER little ball to play with." says Jeffy.
OK, Dennis is clearly supposed to have made up an excuse for not eating his carrots, but it's a very cute excuse, so that really mitigates it a lot. And even if it didn't, we once again have a Keane child doing some actual damage for no apparent reason, so it has to go to the Keanes again.
Monday, 2014-04-21.
Dennis the Menace.
Henry steps out of the car, which he has just reversed into a signpost. Dennis is in the back seat.
"It's gonna be hard to blame this one on the post." says Dennis.
Family Circus.
Dolly and Jeffy examine their Easter eggs.
"The East Bunny must have a lot of chickens workin' for him." says Dolly.
I'm almost tempted to give this one to the Keanes as well, just for how well Dennis is reacting to the car crash, and because Jeffy looks slightly disappointed in his egg, but let's just call it a draw again.
Tuesday, 2014-04-22.
Dennis the Menace.
"If anyone knows who threw this eraser, raise your hand." says the teacher.
All the students raise their hands except for Dennis, who tries to act casual.
Family Circus.
"The wastebasket is full." says Jeffy. "Should I empty it or just get a new one?"
Well, Dennis is the clear winner this time. Jeffy's just an idiot.
Wednesday, 2014-04-23.
Dennis the Menace.
"Umm..." sighs Dennis, smelling Mrs. Wilson's freshly-baked biscuits. "Now this is how a kitchen should smell."
Family Circus.
Billy is doing his homework. Thel is watching.
"It's no fair." says Billy. "There's way more history to learn now than there was when you and daddy were kids."
Billy's implying that his parents are old, but presumably not on purpose. Dennis, on the other hand, is clearly paying Mrs. Wilson a compliment, but possibly just because he wants some biscuits. There's very little chance of her not giving them to him anyway though so it's fairly irrelevant. I'm just going to call this one a draw as well.
And so the final scores are two to one. Neither is particularly menacing, but the Family Circus kids aren't supposed to be, so there's no shame there. And they still managed to beat Dennis. I'd say it's definitely time to remove "the menace" from the title.
Thursday, 2014-04-17.
Dennis the Menace.
"Eatin' your cookies and changin' channels is the only exercise Mr. Wilson gets." says Dennis to Mrs. Wilson. Mr Wilson steadfastly ignores him and continues channel-surfing.
Family Circus.
The tablecloth has a large chunk cut out of it and a pair of scissors lie on the floor nearby.
"Maybe this'll just be one of those things we'll look back on and laugh." squawks Billy as Thel drags him out of the room.
OK, Billy has this one in the bag, hands down. Deliberately damaging the tablecloth for no apparent reason is far more menacing than just making a mildly inappropriate comment about Mr. Wilson's health.
Friday, 2014-04-18.
Dennis the Menace.
"What am I doin' wrong, dad?" asks Dennis, trying unsuccessfully to kick a football. "My punts look more like bunts."
Henry observes contemplatively.
Family Circus.
"I sure am glad PJ is still the size of my hug." says Dolly.
Let's call this one a draw. There's no menace in either one.
Saturday, 2014-04-19.
Dennis the Menace.
Alice points accusingly at an empty bowl.
"I didn't throw the carrots away, mom." says Dennis. "I put them outside for the Easter Bunny."
Family Circus.
Water covers the bathroom floor. A dispirited Bil stands over the toilet with plunger in hand.
"If it's easier, you could just buy me ANOTHER little ball to play with." says Jeffy.
OK, Dennis is clearly supposed to have made up an excuse for not eating his carrots, but it's a very cute excuse, so that really mitigates it a lot. And even if it didn't, we once again have a Keane child doing some actual damage for no apparent reason, so it has to go to the Keanes again.
Monday, 2014-04-21.
Dennis the Menace.
Henry steps out of the car, which he has just reversed into a signpost. Dennis is in the back seat.
"It's gonna be hard to blame this one on the post." says Dennis.
Family Circus.
Dolly and Jeffy examine their Easter eggs.
"The East Bunny must have a lot of chickens workin' for him." says Dolly.
I'm almost tempted to give this one to the Keanes as well, just for how well Dennis is reacting to the car crash, and because Jeffy looks slightly disappointed in his egg, but let's just call it a draw again.
Tuesday, 2014-04-22.
Dennis the Menace.
"If anyone knows who threw this eraser, raise your hand." says the teacher.
All the students raise their hands except for Dennis, who tries to act casual.
Family Circus.
"The wastebasket is full." says Jeffy. "Should I empty it or just get a new one?"
Well, Dennis is the clear winner this time. Jeffy's just an idiot.
Wednesday, 2014-04-23.
Dennis the Menace.
"Umm..." sighs Dennis, smelling Mrs. Wilson's freshly-baked biscuits. "Now this is how a kitchen should smell."
Family Circus.
Billy is doing his homework. Thel is watching.
"It's no fair." says Billy. "There's way more history to learn now than there was when you and daddy were kids."
Billy's implying that his parents are old, but presumably not on purpose. Dennis, on the other hand, is clearly paying Mrs. Wilson a compliment, but possibly just because he wants some biscuits. There's very little chance of her not giving them to him anyway though so it's fairly irrelevant. I'm just going to call this one a draw as well.
And so the final scores are two to one. Neither is particularly menacing, but the Family Circus kids aren't supposed to be, so there's no shame there. And they still managed to beat Dennis. I'd say it's definitely time to remove "the menace" from the title.
2014-04-02
One-Panel Wednesday: Dentist the Menace
Dennis the Menace, 2014-03-27.
Alice is talking to Dennis's teacher, Ms. Duffey.
"Dennis displays great leadership," says Ms. Duffey, "and that makes me nervous."
No reason or explanation is given for her nervousness.
F-Minus, 2014-04-02.
A man lies face-down on a massage table. A man in a white coat lies on the floor looking up at him and reaching toward his face.
"Ohhh, yeah." says the man on the floor. "Impacted molar. Hand me the forceps, will ya?"
It seems that the second man is a dentist with a very unusual method of examining his patients.
Alice is talking to Dennis's teacher, Ms. Duffey.
"Dennis displays great leadership," says Ms. Duffey, "and that makes me nervous."
No reason or explanation is given for her nervousness.
F-Minus, 2014-04-02.
A man lies face-down on a massage table. A man in a white coat lies on the floor looking up at him and reaching toward his face.
"Ohhh, yeah." says the man on the floor. "Impacted molar. Hand me the forceps, will ya?"
It seems that the second man is a dentist with a very unusual method of examining his patients.
2014-03-21
Philosophical Friday: Human or Animal?
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| Dennis the Menace, 2014-03-14. |
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| Sherman's Lagoon, 2014-03-19. |
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| Pluggers, 2014-03-21. |
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| B.C., 2014-03-20. |
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| B.C. |
2014-03-19
One-Panel Wednesday: Hey Girl
Sonja and her owners (a man and a woman) stand outside their house watching Heathcliff go by in a dirigible with "HEY GIRL" written on the side. Sonja is clearly delighted.
"You never blimp me any more." says the woman.
A police officer cuffs a man who has just spray-painted "Watch your step" on the wall beside a small step in the middle of a footpath.
"Helpful? Perhaps." says a second officer. "But still illegal."
"Thanks, Dennis." says Margaret as she leaves the Mitchell house. "I had a really nice time."
Dennis turns to his mother and shrugs.
"I must be losin' my touch." he says.
Leroy and Loretta crouch, facing each other, eager grins on their faces as they prepare to leap.
"Last time I ever ask them to hug it out." sighs the marriage counsellor.
"You never blimp me any more." says the woman.
A police officer cuffs a man who has just spray-painted "Watch your step" on the wall beside a small step in the middle of a footpath.
"Helpful? Perhaps." says a second officer. "But still illegal."
"Thanks, Dennis." says Margaret as she leaves the Mitchell house. "I had a really nice time."
Dennis turns to his mother and shrugs.
"I must be losin' my touch." he says.
Leroy and Loretta crouch, facing each other, eager grins on their faces as they prepare to leap.
"Last time I ever ask them to hug it out." sighs the marriage counsellor.
2013-11-09
The Mitchells' neighbours are arseholes
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| Dennis the Menace, 2013-10-31. |
So what we have here is a comic in which a child is persecuted by his hateful neighbours and bears it with unnatural good grace. He's not even upset. He's just accepted that this is the way it is and if he wants to be treated the same as everyone else then he just has to hide who he is. Is this a metaphor for homophobia or something?
2013-09-26
Dennis the Menace
"I don't think putting carrots in the cookie jar is very funny, Mom." says Dennis.
But Alice thinks it is very funny. Very funny indeed. She can scarcely contain her amusement.
Dennis the Menace, 2013-09-23.
But Alice thinks it is very funny. Very funny indeed. She can scarcely contain her amusement.
Dennis the Menace, 2013-09-23.
2013-09-20
Pondering Dennis the Menace
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| Dennis the Menace, 2013-09-17. |
2013-09-08
Dennis the Menace
"I think Mr. Wilson is likable!" says Gina, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary.
"Did you say he's like a bull?" asks Dennis.
Gina makes no reply.
Dennis the Menace, 2013-09-05.
"Did you say he's like a bull?" asks Dennis.
Gina makes no reply.
Dennis the Menace, 2013-09-05.
2013-08-27
Dennis the Menace
Mr. Wilson has been summoned for jury duty, and although this would normally be aggravating to him as it would mean him giving up his day and whatever plans he had for it, it turns out that in this case the day he has been summoned is one on which his wife had agreed that they would babysit Dennis, and as Mr. Wilson has an intense dislike of Dennis he is glad of the opportunity to avoid his company. For this reason, he is smiling.
Dennis the Menace, 2013-08-21.
Dennis the Menace, 2013-08-21.
2013-07-14
2013-07-13
2013-07-06
Pondering Dennis the Menace
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| Dennis the Menace, 2013-07-01. |
2013-06-16
Pondering Dennis the Menace
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| Dennis the Menace, 2013-05-29. |
She's not alone in her opinions though. Dennis's parents have the same bizarre attitude, that this perfect child is somehow a handful. Mr. Wilson is the worst by far though, because he's openly hostile to Dennis. And further evidence of Dennis's complete lack of menace, he is still friendly and polite to Mr. Wilson despite that.
Only Mrs. Wilson seems to see Dennis as he actually is. I think maybe she was just always nice to him even when he was menacing though, it's just the one thing that makes more sense now than it originally did.
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| Dennis the Menace, 2013-05-30. |
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