Sitcom Thursday: Hiram classes it up

Brewster Rockit: Space Guy!, 2014-06-02.

"Smart guns that only work for their owners. Smart cars that steer themselves." says Dr Mel. "Smart gadgets are the future! I'm creating other smart gadgets. Like the smart fork!"
Brewster doesn't reply.
Meanwhile, Cliff is using Mel's new fork.
"I think you've had enough." says the fork.

---

Mel's a bit behind the times. Those already exist.

---

Dustin, 2014-06-03.

Meg is writing in her diary.
"Tomorrow I plan to confess my darkest, most closely guarded secret ever." she writes. "A secret so ignominious, that heretofore, I have been unable to risk its disclosure, even here."
Later, as Meg is eating at the kitchen table, Dustin comes into the room.
"Meg, quick question..." he says. "What does 'ignominious' mean?"
Meg is horrified at the realisation that her brother reads her diary.

---

At first I wondered why Dustin would read Meg's diary. I doubt it can be of any interest to him. But then I realised, he must have known when he asked that question that Meg would realise that he'd been reading it, but he would still have plausible deniability, so the reason becomes clear. He read his sister's diary to annoy her. Fair enough.

---

Hi and Lois, 2014-06-03.

His is unshaven and dressed casually.
"My book group is coming over." says Lois. "Can you make yourself a little more presentable?"
"OK." says Hi and goes off to do so.
Later, Lois enters the living-room to find Hi seated in an armchair, now dressed in a smoking jacket, monocle and ascot, holding a pipe and a snifter.
"I went for the literary look." he says.

---

You've got to admire his dedication to the joke. Also the fact that he already owned all those things.

---

Andy Capp, 2014-06-04.

Andy staggers onto the pitch, hiccuping.
"Fancy turning up for football after being in the pub." says one of his team-mates. "Disgraceful"
"He's in no fit state to play" says another, as Andy collapses.
"Hold on," says the first, "I think he could do a job in goal"
So they get some rope and tie his arms to the top of the goal, hanging him there as a sort of makeshift barrier.

Philosophical Friday: Leave Mimes Alone

Brewster Rockit: Space Guy! 2014-03-25.

Todd the Dinosaur, 2014-03-28.

Why are mimes consistently portrayed in comics as being really annoying? Is anyone actually bothered by mimes? Are mimes even common enough for people to have much of an opinion on them at all? Seems like a really weird target to pick. Is this some historical thing that has just become comedy shorthand even though it no longer makes sense, like slipping on banana skins? What did mimes ever do to deserve this?

---

Hägar the Horrible, 2014-03-27.

Seeing that Hamlet's girlfriend's name here got me thinking about the names of comic strip characters and how weird they are. "Hernia" is certainly up there, but it's not as atypical as you might imagine. On The Fastrack has "Fistula Breech", there's Blondie's "Dagwood Bumstead", B.C.'s "Cute Chick" and "Fat Broad". One of the kids in Baby Blues goes by "Hammie".  Hi and Lois called their twins "Dot" and "Ditto", and there's Lois's brother Beetle Bailey.

I don't know where I'm going with this, it's just something that struck me.

Brewster Hotdog: Lunch Guy!

"I can't decide on a costume." says Cliff.
"Better hurry!" says Lt. Snap. "The Halloween party is tonight!"
Just then Cpt. Rockit arrives wearing a hotdog costume.
"Hey, look!" says Snap. "Brewster's all ready!"
"Ready for what?" asks Rockit.
"The Halloween party tonight!" says Snap.
"Oh, right!" says Rockit. "I'd better go change into my costume!"

It's funny because they thought he was in a Hallowe'en costume, but actually it was a sex thing.

Brewster Rockit: Space Guy!, 2013-10-28.

Brewster Rockit: Space guy!

Cliff Clewless objects to the government spying on his personal communication but has no problem sharing information at his own discretion with a particular subset of people he knows. Apparently this is supposed to be funny.

Brewster Rockit, 2013-08-21.

Brewster Rockit: Space Guy!

The Dogonian doctor

"We're going to test your motor skills." says a doglike humanoid doctor to Brewster. "I want you to throw this ball."
Brewster complies and the Dogonian doctor runs after it, barking.

The doctor returns with the ball and says "OK, do it again, but I want you to fake-throw it a few times first."